A KyoHaru May May
by Kalachuchi
Summary: KyoHaru microfic meme from tumblr.


**TITLE: **A KyoHaru May May  
******DISCLAIMER:** I do not own OHSHC.  
**AUTHOR'S NOTES: **Unbetaed. I apologize for the terrible title pun. also, this is for lei and the bday fic that was due two years ago (this totally counts)  
**SUMMARY: **KyoHaru microfic meme from tumblr.

* * *

**A KyoHaru May May**

* * *

**ANGST **  
From the start, Kyoya knows it will always be Tamaki who will win her heart. He does not even try to compete against him even though she interests him. It will be pointless, he says. It will not gain him merit, he says.

So why does he feel like dying when Tamaki asks him to be his Best Man?

* * *

**AU **[aka The Boyband AU that never pushed through]

The thing is, Kyoya knows that when they get find out, their reputation will be at stake; five long years of hard work and sleepless nights will all go to waste. But Haruhi's voice is the one thing that they have been looking for all these time and they are all willing to risk it. Having her would make their group finally complete and frankly, Kyoya has long been waiting for someone like her to sing the song he has finished writing. Adding a new member to an already established group is difficult but she is polite, quiet and has a strange charisma that all the other members are drawn into - which helped her to be quickly accepted. Haruhi is not that much of a dancer, not yet, but she is working hard to keep up with them.

All in all, she is the perfect addition to their group.

Except for the fact that they are a boy group, and that you know. Haruhi is a _girl_.

But those are trivialities, Kyoya thinks. Their security is tight, their agent Renge is incredibly good at what she does and Kyoya has his own contacts if ever a problem would arise. As long as no one finds out about Haruhi's real gender, everything will work out fine.

They'll be unstoppable.

* * *

**CRACK **  
It has only been three hours since they have mysteriously exchanged bodies, but Kyoya is already taking advantage of being Haruhi and is surrounded by her usual group of customers.

"… and the photo shoot was simply the best experience of my whole life," he says, smiling fondly at the photo books spread across the table in front them. "And it would mean so much to me, really, if you would purchase this winter collection that we have all worked so hard for."

The group of girls gaps and clutches at their hearts.

"Of course, Haruhi-kun! We will support you in anyway possible!" Hanamiya-san promises fervently.

"It will be a great honor to have this momento," Chitose-san chirps. "And of your first photo shoot too! How cute!"

The other girls nod in agreement and promise to buy as well.

Kyoya-in-Haruhi's-body flashes them a dazzling smile. "Will you also buy the spring collection next month?" he pretends to ask shyly.

The girls squeal and swoon.

Across the room, Haruhi-in-Kyoya's-body rolls her eyes. They told no one about their situation yet because they know it will bring chaos to the club. Tamaki and the twins will get hysterical, and both Honey and Mori will worry. She scans the room and notices the twins who are currently making fun of Tamaki in the corner. Haruhi sighs in resignation and clears her throat.

"Hikaru, Kaoru," she begins, and the twins freeze at the sound of Kyoya's voice. "Please stop pestering Tamaki-senpa – er, Tamaki and go back to work."

The twins straighten to salute her. "Aye, Kyoya-senpai!" they cry before running back to their table.

Huh. Haruhi blinks in surprise. The twins had never, _never_ obeyed her so quickly before. No wonder Kyoya is like this. This kind of power is addicting. She meets Kyoya's gaze who looks amused, and she simply pushes the glasses up her nose, the way the real Kyoya would.

She could get used to this.

* * *

**CROSSOVER **[a sort of omake for **Debt Note**. so sorry L. I luv you, really ]

"So, how's the notebook I gave you?" Light asks over the phone.

Kyoya remembers the way Haruhi's lips felt against his and how she had blushed so prettily after.

"Worked like a charm," he says. "How's your plan for world domination?"

"Going pretty well, if not for that meddling L. How is he not dead from diabetes yet? No, really. He's practically inhaling calories of sugar."

"You do know I had my contacts look into him. I know his name, you just need to ask." Kyoya could hear Light's hesitation over the line.

"No," Light finally says. "I prefer to do it my own way."

"Good luck with that," Kyoya says approvingly. "Send my regards to Ryuk."

* * *

**FIRST TIME **

Kyoya's hands are naturally cold so when he moves his hand to touch hers, he hesitates. She looks at him, takes his hand into her warm ones and does not let go.

* * *

**FLUFF **

"You really don't have to do this," Haruhi says as Kyoya narrows his eyes at the tub of goldfish. He is concentrating hard.

"Don't be ridiculous Haruhi. You said you want one, I will give you one," he says as he squints at the water and the fishes swimming beneath the surface. He is appalled that the owner would not let him buy the goldfish even though he offered to pay _five times_ the expenses, and that he would have to play a game for it. He knows this is beneath an Ootori – if his father catches him crouching on the ground, letting commoners watch him like an entertainment show, he would probably be scolded for life. But this is now a matter of pride because he has been trying to catch a fish for the past twenty minutes and he has not. yet. caught. one.

He suddenly moves, faster than Haruhi had ever seen him move before, plunges his net into the water and scoops up three goldfish at once. The little kids beside him are loudly cheering him on (_Go Eyeglasses-san!_).

The net shreds and the fishes are back in the water once again. Kyoya drops the net in irritation.

"Kyoya-senpai," Haruhi begins, but he simply hands the owner a fistful of coins he got from her (who knew they do not accept gold credit cards here?) and receives a fresh net from him.

How can this be difficult? Ootori Kyoya is at the top of his class, has the number of the Prime Minister in his speed dial and has made at least a dozen of successful business proposal at the tender age of sixteen. He just needs to catch a single fish. It won't even live long in this world, why are they resisting so much? This is now a game against an Ootori, and Kyoya will not let a tub of fishes best him.

(The fact that Haruhi mentioned that she would like to have one does _not_ have anything to do with it. AT ALL.)

Fifteen minutes later (and Haruhi's empty wallet), she carries a plastic bag with the smallest goldfish swimming inside. And if Kyoya looks a bit smug as they walk towards the food stalls where Tamaki and the rest are eating, Haruhi does not say anything.

It is his first time in a festival after all.

* * *

**HUMOR **[From the January 2011 Special Chapter]

Nanako dabs at an imaginary tear. "Ah, Haruhi-chan, I am so sorry you ended up with this sly four-eyes. You have my condolences! My sympathy! If you ever want to get away from him, don't hesitate to call! I will do my best to help you! Save yourself from this demon, Haruhi! He is a tyrant and an evil-incarnate! Save your soul!" she cries, attracting the attention of the restaurant patrons.

"Can I kill her now?" Kyoya asks pleasantly as Akito wonders how he can magically disappear from his seat.

* * *

**HURT/COMFORT **

"Why," Haruhi asks as she dabs Betadine on Kyoya's finger, "were you trying to cook?"

"It was supposed to be a surprise," Kyoya says in a tone that in anyone else would sound suspiciously like he is sulking. He glares at the offending vegetable peeler and resolves to chuck it out of the window as soon as possible. "The recipe was simple. I don't know what happened."

Haruhi tries not to smile as she puts a Band-Aid around his finger. "Looks like the great Ootori Kyoya isn't that good at everything after all," she says lightly.

Kyoya narrows his eyes at her.

* * *

**SMUT **

Kyoya massages her hip, the slow drag of his thumb up and down on her skin made a shot of electricity up her spine. He kisses his way from the back of her ear, down to the expanse of her throat, to her shoulders where he spends a few seconds nipping against her collar bone. Once he is satisfied with the mark he leaves, he moves down, mouthing his way down her stomach until he kneels between her knees and alternately kisses and nips at the inside of her thighs, until she is nothing but a pool of screaming ecstasy.

Haruhi grips the bed sheets, throws her head back and gasps his name over and over -

Forget cooking. Ootori Kyoya is good at _almost_ everything_._

* * *

**UST **

The first time Kyoya-kun calls Fuyumi to ask if the Senjirou clan still makes vases, she thinks nothing of it.

The second time he asks if it is possible if he could have that 15th century sculpture she received for her wedding, she agrees. She never liked it anyway.

The third and fourth time she learns that the expensive European teacups and mirror from Rome she bought three years ago _accidentally_ got broken during Kyoya-kun's club activities, she simply forgives him.

By the time Kyoya-kun's semester break starts, she gets suspicious when his favorite glass display that he never lets _anyone_ touch also gets broken during one of the host club activities. Fuyumi wants to talk to him but unlike Akito, she loves Kyoya-kun enough not to pry in his personal life. At least, not yet.

When she meets a certain Fujioka Haruhi during one of Ouran's festivals and learns _how_ she became a host, something triggers at the back of her mind but she cannot seem to put a finger on it. It isn't until she catches Kyoya-kun and notices how his gaze lingers at Haruhi-chan and how he regretfully informs her that her debt is increasing, _sadly that would be another two months of work for the host club_, that she finally makes sense of it all.

Kyoya-kun is adorable when he's in love.

**THE END.**

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End note: i lied. there is nothing micro about this. T_T


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